FRIENDS INDEED

I am the fourth of eight children. My oldest sibling is six years older than me, and my youngest sibling is 11 years younger than me. My siblings and I have lived together most of our lives, but rarely ever had anything in common.

I remember as a child I could never go out with my older siblings, because the gap in age difference, and really had no interest in what my younger siblings were doing.

So I had to find friends. As a child in elementary school I was often teased and misunderstood. Other kids would call me names and tell me that I was switching as I walk, which lead to them calling me things like sissy, faggot, punks, and a list of other homophobic remarks I dare not mention. I would find solace and individuality in books, and other crafts offered by the teacher, or after school programs.

One time when I was in the third grade I paid a girl two dollars to be my friend for the whole day, and she did. I was happy for that, but came to realize that was making my self esteem even lower.

I grew up and went to middle school, and somewhere in the process I found power and happiness within myself, and began to stand up for myself. I decided that I would no longer take the abuse of my peers and learned how to love myself regardless of friends or not.

That's when I met Basilla Perez. Basilla was a very pretty Mexican girl. On the first day of English class I sat next to her, "Hi. I'm Lamar," I said to her.

"Hello I'm Basilla."

"Nice to meet you" we said in unison.

Basilla was like my first real friend ever. She made me feel normal when I knew that I wasn't. Basilla made me feel real, and really help me through the bad times in adolescents, she was my rock, and she was who understood me. My day to day criticism became something of the past. I guest since I had a female friend the speculations started to die down. Even though Basilla was not my girlfriend in an affectionate type of way, she still stood up for me like I was her boyfriend. Sometimes when people would say I was gay or something she would lie and say that we were dating so I couldn't be gay, and for that reason she was the first person I ever came out to in the eighth grade.

When I came out to her she never stop looking at me like I was a different person she just saw who I was before she knew. And that was really important to me I had a friend no matter what would be there for me for whatever I came to face. She made me realize all the people in the world were not bad. She opened my eyes up to new possibilities she gave me a chance to be me when society showed me solidarity and confusion, she was who gave me piece of mind.

I lost contact with Basilla a while ago, but wish everyday that she was still in my life. I would give a right arm just to tell her how much she helped me grow, and if I would have never met her in that sixth grade class. Then I would probably not be who I am today. Thank you, Basilla Perez.